Tighten the Knot
Week Four /// Brian Massey /// Solo Study
As I grew up, I was obsessed with dinosaurs. I had all the books, the toys, clothing, everything. I could not get enough of them! So much so that when Jurassic Park was released in 1993, I could not wait to see it.
Now, I was a little young, but I was still there to watch it on the big screen. My childhood was literally right before my eyes.
Now, the rest of the movies (in my opinion) do not even compare to how ridiculously awesome the first movie was. However, each one had their moments.
In the second movie, “The Lost World,” Ian Malcolm (Jeff Goldblum) finds himself back on an island with dinosaurs in looking for his girlfriend with a crew that was put together by John Hammond (the founder of Jurassic Park).
In typical Jurassic Park fashion, what was made to be a simple trip turned into one full of suspense, action and epic Dinosaur attacks.
At one point, Malcolm’s girlfriend Sarah decides to be a great Humanitarian (Dinosauritarian technically…) and rescue a injured baby T-Rex from the hands of the inGen crew who were trying to build a new “Jurassic Park” in San Diego. Needless to say, that did not end well.
Just as we are protective and would do whatever it took to find our children if they were missing, so did the baby T-Rexs’ parents.
So they attacked the trailer where Sarah, Malcolm and Nick Van Owen were caring for the baby T-Rex.
After the initial attack, Eddie who was at the “High Hide” came back to check on his friends, who were now having part of their vehicle over a cliff.
Eddie took it upon himself to hook up his car to both the trailer as well as tie a knot around a large tree to help pull his friends to safety.
In typical movie fashion, it was raining and slippery, which makes it rather difficult to tie a knot and save your friends from falling off a cliff.
Then, to add to it, the two T-Rexs returned because after all “Mama’s very angry.”
Unfortunately, despite his heroic efforts, intentions and will power, Eddie found himself as dinner for the two T-Rexes.
However, the knot that he tied around that tree the second time around stayed strong and secure and eventually saved their lives.
Knots are what hold things together.
Despite the elements or dinosaurs that may make a situation difficult, maybe even impossible, when the knot is securely tied, it makes the situation, object or item immovable and unshakeable.
That is how a marriage is designed.
It is not a matter of if or how but when a storm is going to occur or when a “Dinosaur” is going to attack your marriage but when.
A marriage is designed to be anchored with three ropes: You, Your Spouse and God.
When it is lacking God, your marriage is not nearly as strong and your knot is not as tight as it could be and should be.
We find this example in Ecclesiastes 4:9-12:
“Two are better than one, because they have a good reward for their toil. For if they fall, one will lift up his fellow.
But woe to him who is alone when he falls and has not another to lift him up!
Again, if two lie together, they keep warm, but how can one keep warm alone? And though a man might prevail against one who is alone, two will withstand him—a threefold cord is not quickly broken.”
One of the most important gifts that you can give your spouse, your significant other or your friend is your full attention. It is prioritizing your time with them. It is providing value to what they're passionate about. It’s affirming them in their dreams and desires. It is encouraging them with authentic love and excitement. It is creating time for them. It is at times sacrificing your agenda to come alongside and team up with them to grow closer together. It is worth it.
Unfortunately, there are times that it is hard to “tighten the knot” due to past hurts, broken trust and or troubling and trying circumstances. Maybe it is hard to believe that the knot can ever be tightened again. Possibly you went through a divorce and it is hard to believe that you will ever find someone because you are filled with anger, frustration and pain. Maybe you’ve lost a spouse and are grieving and unsure of how to move forward. Maybe you still haven't found Mr. or Mrs. Right and you’re struggling to believe that that person is out there.
If this is you, find encouragement in 1 Peter 5: 6-10. Let it become your anthem:
“Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.
Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.
Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.
And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.”
It should not come as a surprise that your marriage/relationships are under attack. It was literally the first thing that God created. His first gift he gave the world (besides a nap…He put Adam to sleep in order to create Eve...just sayin’) was marriage. He created us for relationships with other people.
Therefore, it is obvious that the first thing that Satan attacked was the first thing God created.
How he attacks is the same way that he has from the beginning of time - he attacks our pride.
As it says in 1 Peter 5:8, the devil “prowls around looking for someone to devour.” That is why Peter’s response is to “resist him.”
It is believing the promises of who God says you are above the lies that the enemy tries to make you believe.
It is believing what God says your marriage is instead of how the enemy tries to define your marriage based on the other person's’ faults.
After all, your spouse/significant other/friend will fail you at some point, it’s inevitable. We are all human (unless of course you’re a Dinosaur...which would be totally awesome).
However, your worth is not found in what another person says about you or even what you say about yourself.
Your worth is found and is defined by the One who created you.
As you enter into finding your worth in what God says about you, you begin to walk in the light:
“This is the message we have heard from him and proclaim to you, that God is light, and in him is no darkness at all.
If we say we have fellowship with him while we walk in darkness, we lie and do not practice the truth.
But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus his Son cleanses us from all sin.”
(1 John 1:5-7)
You cannot begin to expect there to be a change in your marriage/relationship until you first walk in the light of the Lord and until you prioritize your individual pursuit of the one who pursues you.
When you individually are seeking after the Lord, Matthew 7:7 becomes more than just words on a page.
Instead, the Word of God (the Bible), which is living and active and sharper than any two-edged sword (Hebrews 4:12) penetrates our hearts, it becomes a habit that we live and can’t help but be a light that shines bright in the darkness of the world.
When that happens in your life, imagine what could happen in your marriage/relationships.
Imagine the tightness of the knot that you began to tie on your wedding day.
Imagine when what could happen to your marriage/relationship when it is saturated in prayer and bound together by the love and protection of God the Father.
It. will. be. UNBREAKABLE!
“Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you. For everyone who asks receives, and the one who seeks finds, and to the one who knocks it will be opened.”
(Matthew 7: 7-8, ESV)
It’s time to get real with yourself.
Where do you find your worth?
What makes you feel like a million bucks?
What happens when your worth is compromised?
What is God calling you to do that you are wrestling with the “what ifs” that are continually playing in the background of your mind (i.e. What if it doesn’t work out, etc)?
God is a sustainer, a refuge, a comforter, a provider, a mender of broken hearts, a keeper.
He is loving, stronger, greater, more than enough, a healer - THE GREAT I AM.
God IS greater than any hurdle or pain that you ever face.
What “God is” attribute do you need to hold on to?
What “God is” truth can you use to battle and defeat your “what if?” in your life?